Three names you go by:
1. Jing
2. Jinggay
3. Bangge
Three pseudonyms you have had:
1. Jo March
2. deviant
3. Soul's Idol
Three physical things you like about yourself:
1. Eyes
2. Chin
3. Voice
Three physical things you don't like about yourself:
1. Hair
2. Ankles
3. Extra weight
Three parts of your heritage:
1. Filipino
2. Spanish
3. Filipino
Three things that scare you:
1. losing the people I love
2. hurting people
3. Failing myself
Three of your everyday essentials:
1. Cellphone
2. handkerchief
3. eyeglasses
Three of your favorite musical artists:
4 na lang!
1. Barbie's Cradle
2. No Doubt
3. Mishka Adams
4. MYMP
Three of your favorite songs:
4 na lang!
1. "Simile Smile" Barbie's Cradle
2. "Sunday Morning" No Doubt
3. "Invisible War" Julia Fordham
4. "Swept Away" Paolo Santos version (theme song ba!)
Three things you want in a relationship:
1. comfort & humor
2. acceptance
3. good memories you can still share as years go by
Three lies and truths in no particular order:
LIES:
1. I'm happy with my married life (huh!)
2. Love is the most important thing in the world
3. I'm good at being bad
TRUTH:
1. Everyday is a new day to start a new life
2. I'm jealous of people who are doing exactly what I want to do.
3. The best things in life are free
Three physical things about the opposite sex that appeals to you:
1. Nice smile
2. Voice
3. Gait
Three of your favorite hobbies:
1. Reading
2. Singing
3. Journal writing
Three things you want to do really badly now:
1. have a lengthy talk with friends
2. drink green tea frap
3. update my blog
Three careers you're considering/you've considered:
1. Educator
2. Psychologist
3. Singer (huh!)
Three places you want to go on vacation:
1. Rome
2. Spain
3. Greece
Three kid's names you like:
1. Mariel
2. Riya (indian)
3. Mishka
Three things you want to do before you die:
1. Publish a book
2. Live abroad or Travel (the many places I want to explore)
3. Have a tattoo
Three ways that you are stereotypically a boy:
1. I can enjoy watching URCC
2. I admire women with sexy bodies
3. I hate oh-so-feminine details
Three ways that you are stereotypically a girl:
1. I'm very emotional
2. I love shopping
3. I can do multi-tasking
Three celeb crushes:
1. Johnny Depp
2. Josh Hartnett
3. Heath Ledger
***
Where the clock ticks to a different time..."
"You don't belong here if, in a very unexplainable manner, you somehow feel a certain kind of homesickness, as if there is a place you need to return to. If this is what you feel, then you must be an ET", echoes the hermit-sounding voice of the guest speaker on a radio program discussing the topic of knowing if you're an ET or not.
My God, I'm searching for an answer not more questions. I supposed and I hoped that at the end of my soul-searching period, I wouldn't buy the idea that I could have been a humanitarian friend-from-beyond, only to explain and justify my being me.
"Sometimes I wish I was born on a different sun
where the shadow falls on a different pole..."
Individualism. Big deal. Perhaps that's where I draw the justification that being different is confidence, and confidence is power. I normally admire people who have the guts to look, feel and act their natural way, 'though so odd, unaffected by what the society dictates them to be.
"Sometimes I wish I was born on a different moon
where the clock ticks to a different tune..."
I just somehow feel to nod on what "Girl Interrupted" (the movie) preached, that in order to live one has to be insane for awhile.
"And I wish I will be here
Where the wind blows in a different way
Where I could be me..."
"Sometimes I wish I wasn't born at all
And keep flying with my angels wings
-song excerpts from "I Wish" by Color it Red-
(Leen, Tsel, Jing, Daks)" Ang lahat ng nangyayari ay may dahilan"
That was the quote of the day, coming from my friend Daks. It may sound so usual (nkakatawa nga at first to hear it, kasi ba naman si Daks pa ang nagsabi he he), so familiar, but it conveyed a lot of meaning for each one of us. Especially for me. It made me accept the burden of problems ng medyo mas magaan...Naniniwala din ako na lahat ng nangyayari, whether maganda o hind, problema man e merong dahilan. Hindi man sya narerealize sa ngayon, pero pwedeng masagot nya ang lahat ng tanong sa mga susunod na araw.
Last night, after a long time, and without even planning and organizing this get-together, I saw my friends again - Daks, Tsel and Leen (sayang hindi nakarating si Bing). Coming from office in Canlubang, I met Tsel who also came from her work in Sta. Rosa. We bought some food first, then proceed to Daks' house. When we arrived, the very preggy Leen was already there waiting with Daks.
Since we're supposed to do our "girl" thing (read: tsikahan), we headed to a room where we shall spend our next 4 hours. We ate first, then discussed our lives. Kwentuhan....crazy, crazy, crazy happy, happy, happy lives ha ha...we have things in common - we all went to Letran in college, took the same course (BS Industrial Engineering), we're all married, we're all moms (I counted Leen 'though she has yet to give birth to her first baby on October). First Tsel and I thought how weird it is to think that it's almost 10 years since we graduated from college, and we barely felt how we've matured (right choice of word di ba?).
We discussed so many things, about lives, marital problems, raising kids, remembering other college contemporaries. We each have our "moment"...er, I mean our own stories and problems to tell...grabe sa tawanan...
Sana we'll have another marathon kwentuhan session...nakaka miss din tong ganito..We're glad to feel that we can count on each other...marami ng pinagdaanan...naging magkasama sa maraming pagkakataon, tumawa, umiyak, nanlait ng iba (at yon at yon din ang nilalait ha ha, sino kaya yon ha ha).....tumawa sa mga paulit ulit na kwento...
To you guys, thank you for keeping me company for the past...how many years ba?...more than 10 years pala (counting from our 1st~2nd year in college di ba)....grabe ang tagal na non di ba?....at andyan pa rin kayo, making me laugh, making me forget my problems even for a while...thanks.
Tsel, good luck sa work mo at sa taebo...Daks, bago kayo umalis papunta New Zealand dapat merong party ha...Leen, good luck sa panganganak mo, galingan mo pag iri he he, congrats din...Bing, sayang namiss ka namin kagabi. Di bale next time, meron pa naman.
It was a sunny Saturday (August 20), so I decided to take Ira out the confines of her apple green & pink toy kingdom. She left Patrick, Benok, Pipay, her carebears (her favorite toys) for a while. It is her first chance to dine..in where else? Jolllibee! (he he, as if she can now munch the kiddie-favorite spaghetti!)...We went there to have our breakfast. I thought she may take a few sip of their creamy macaroni soup.
Inside the store, she was so demure and just looking around. It was a place new to her, with faces all unfamiliar. She concentrated looking at the
colorful chairs inside. Then in less than 30 minutes she is now up and about making her usual gigil with matching squeal. She tasted the soup and she liked it, but I felt that it was an additive-rich and too salty food for her so I let her drink her milk instead.
I heard it over and over again, chanting and praying to God for graces. It came from Mr. Pido Aguilar of Ateneo Graduate Business School as he speaks in his teatro voice in front of us. That afternoon, I was among his audience as he tackled this topic - Abundance.
Flow & connect
To have abundance, you should flow and connect - go with the flow of life and not against it. Always be connected to others. You never stop from living a life which doesn't flow...give and it shall flow back to you. "You can have anything you want as long as you give up the belief that you cannot have it" ...With abundance, what you have is overflowing, so you have to give and share in order to be refilled.
It's a natural thing that the universe give us everything it can give, we cannot stop it. We just have to recognize it and accept it. Non-abundance is scarcity. It happens because some people do not recognize the things given to him, block it or disconnect from life's flow. For this type of behavior, we have to understand that some people are going through life's "journey". All people have problems, we're all going through something which others don't know. When you don't understand people, you tend to judge him negatively, condemn him, say bad words to him. It is important to understand people's behavior and keep in mind that he may be acting or behaving that way because " he is going through something I don't know"...For your self, the value or the role of this "difficult" people is that he may help you become a better person, he will test your patience and make you realize that life is beautiful.
Abundance or Scarcity?
Abundance is not just about money, it's abundance in all your life's aspects (wealth, self, work, family, friends, romance, rest, recreation, health, faith)
Non-abundance are the following: Global practices (Environmental destruction, war, hunger, materialism, broken relationships);
Filipino practices (Filipino time, fake/pirated CDs, traffic habits, Lotto/jueteng, retail (tingi), debt (utang), politicking, chismis, worry/complain, lusot)
Eliminate any outside influences that don't feed your soul or life purpose.
Dharma or Karma?
"For everything that comes your way is but something you somehow once gave away..."
Abundance is equated with dharma - you reap your rewards
Non-abundance is equated with karma - during payback time, the universe will get what your heart desires- the one or the thing that will hurt you the most when taken away-as payment for all the things you've done.
Practice abundance!....receive abundance!
"I wish I could go back to those fairy book tales
forget the real world awhile
and seek the seas of the talking whales
A place of wishing wells and magic spells
Where everything starts at once upon a time
and long long ago and ends happily ever after
I could go up on the hill and climb with Jill
The giant could smell I'm no Englishman
Cinderella dance with me at the ball
I told the queen of hearts about my plans
I travel in wonderland with Alice
I met with Snowhite in the woods
I flew with Peter Pan in Never Never land
Pick some berries with Miss Red Riding Hood
I could be an outlaw in the West
Save damsels in distress
You could sleep a hundred years
I could wake you up with a kiss
We'll swim the seven seas
We could make love more than twice
Fly like dragons in the sky
We could hung on trees or
Buzz around like bees
We don't need no money baby
Just turn your back
You'll see jumpin jelly bean sacks
Just wait fo me Jack
I'll be back I'll be back
A place of wishing wells and magic spells
where everything starts at once upon a time and long long ago"
and ends happily ever after"
-from Eraserheads-
"..sappy pathetic little me, that was the girl I used to be......"
Ooops I'm not introducing myself nor giving hint of what I was feeling then and now....It's a line from one of my favorite songs from my favorite group No Doubt. This article pays homage to them - especially to Gwen Stefani, the lone front-womanwith her free-spited work.
Over nearly two-decade existence in my system..their best scenes, best sound...I have come to love their pop, reggae, ska performance. If I were to become a singer, I would love to sing the beat of their music...you see I'm a big fan!!!..I particularly enjoy Gwen's vocal prowess. May favorite songs are "Sunday Morning", from their album Tragic Kingdom (1995), with its lively drum roll; "Spiderwebs", and "Underneath It All" from the 2001 Rock Steady album. This reggae-flavored song was also part of the movie soundtrack of 50 First Dates. I surely like their happy songs....
I even planned of naming my baby Gwen Stefani (beat that!)...but that's another story...For now, and with this woman making it with her solo career...I'm still a fan....
Indira Mariel,
Hello, baby...
how are you today?
having you in my arms
seems like a piece of heaven
fell on my lap...
I love you very much!...
Mommy
Much as I would like to spend it by bringing her anywhere else outside home (for her to feel a different environment) to celebrate, the rain did not permit us to do so...Instead I just prepared food and cake and balloons and dressed her up like a doll...oh my baby so cute and charming..I love you so much!!!
That same day I also brought her to her pedia to have her scheduled vaccination for measles. Again, I felt bad to see her start getting anxious when her doctor started rubbing alcohol on the injection site. According to her pedia, at that young age, they may already associate faces with the
things they experienced - in that case, its her doctor's face synonymous to needle and pain....luckily after a very loud cry, for just about 10 seconds, she stopped crying already and started smiling again...
Her next visit will be next month if I decided to have her take the Flu shots...and then the next vaccine will be next year, when she turns a year old...in between those period, I pray to God that she'll be as healthy as she is now...
From the hospital in Calamba, we ate at a restaurant for lunch...I let her sample the taste of sinigang na bangus belly sa miso, and oh boy! she really loved the taste of it...she just kept on sipping and enjoying it as much as I enjoyed watching her mess with food...so cute!....
I love you baby Ira. I will take care of you always, not because it's my obligation but because I love you very very much.
I was too weary, maybe not physically...emotionally? whatever...Looking at my "things-to-do" list I wonder if I can rely on my current strength to finish all of these, anyway, since these are my jobs, and I'm the only one responsible for it (to delegate means nothing!), I decided to draw up plans
and review my timetable...First on my list is consider is "REST"....c'mon I need a break! I want to spend time with my friends to regain my composure.
Today, I texted my friend and a former office mate Jhoan. I asked her if she's available to watch a movie with me in Alabang after my office hours and she, after her "mommy" hours. She's a full-time mother and enjoying the things she do as housewife and mother. Luckily, she's available so off we
went to meet in Alabang. When we're checking which movie to watch, I told her I need to watch a feel-good movie. That leads us to choose the movie "D Anothers" among "The Chocolate Factory", "Wedding Crashers" "The Island". But since we arrived at the cinema way past the start of the 6:40 screening time, the next schedule to consider is the 7:30 schedule that would finish approaching 10pm. We decided not to watch movie anymore, instead we settled for a not-too-crowded place to eat and TALK.
It's nice talking with friends, somehow nakakahanap ka ng kakampi. Jhoan is simply good in listening and sharing her thoughts based on her own experiences. Sayang nga hindi namin kasama si Arlene (another office mate) e di sana mas masarap ang kwentuhan. We talk about so many things. We both experienced the joys and pains of married life. We share these common thoughts - love isn't always enough - no matter what you do, you won't be appreciated all the time...sometimes you become so generous to a fault, that you forgot your self already....pero you still feel the failure of
making the relationship realistically happy.
Looking forward for more kwentuhan with friends....
